


Even Rainy Days Have Color

by orphan_account



Category: Game Grumps
Genre: Gen, Soulmate Color AU, prequel to love is any color
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-11
Updated: 2016-07-11
Packaged: 2018-07-22 23:32:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,993
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7457989
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dan has spent night after night on his bed, asking Brian what the colors look like. He can touch something and know it's the color blue. If only he knew what blue looked like.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Even Rainy Days Have Color

**Author's Note:**

> Prequel to Love is Any Color!

"Hey Dan! Come here, I want to show you something!"

Dan was fiddling with a few sound bites on his computer, trying to put together the beginning of a song, and he had his headphones in so he could hear only them and nothing else. So he didn't hear Brian call from the bedroom.

"Dan?" Brian called louder. Dan still didn't hear. Brain walked into the living room and saw that Dan hadn't heard a bit of what Brian had said. So he walked up to Dan and waved his hand right in front of his face.

He took the headphone set off and let it rest on his neck.

"I'm sorry dude, I didn't hear. What?"

Brian said it was fine, then motioned for Dan to come with him. He did so, disentangling himself from his blankets and walking barefoot into the kitchen.

There were a bunch of paper bags on the table, and a huge vase filled with carnations. Brain gestured to all of the things on the table.

"So Rachel's been sick," Brian explained as he started to take things out of the bags and show them to Dan. A couple cans of soup. A neck pillow. Even a pair of fluffy socks. "And I got these to try and make her feel better. What do you think?"

Dan didn't look at Brian, and he didn't answer the question right away. His eyes were on the flowers in the middle of the table. They were obviously for Rachel, but he leaned in and smelled them anyway. Carnations were his favorite flower. They smelled great, and lasted forever when you picked them from the ground.

If only he could see what colors they were.

To Dan, the carnations were nothing more than a gradient of black to gray. A darker gray here. A whiter color there. But that was it. He tried so hard to imagine what colors they'd be. He tried to imagine them as Brian always described them. As pink and red and white and orange. But he couldn't. He just couldn't. 

"I think she'll like it," Dan replied dejectedly, looking forlornly at the flowers. He slowly reached out his hand, and picked off a stray petal that hung out of place on one of the carnations.

He held it between his index finger and his thumb, rubbing it. It was soft, like the petal of a flower would be, but this didn't make him feel better. All of a sudden, he was just hit with the fact, once again, that he wasn't really alive. He wasn't really living in the world the way he wanted. 

Even thought it was really Dan being cheated, it felt like he was cheating the world. Like it was crafted carefully by a precise hand, using fine brushes to put the dents in the mountains and the grass on the ground. Like it was painted with the utmost care, choosing just the right hues and shading them just the right way. Like everything in the world was someone's work of art, only to have someone like Dan turn a blind eye to it. 

It's like watching a movie without the sound on. You see that there's something going on. You can see that something important is happening, and other people know what it is. But you just can't hear the sounds, so you can only guess. Dan can see the world, but he isn't getting all the information he knows is there.

And usually, it doesn't bother him. Because all things considered, he was happy. He had a steady job that he loved. He had a home. He had friends. They had happy relationships. They had Mates.

But there was just one thing missing. And while it was only one thing, it was a pretty important thing. He didn't have a Mate.

Sure, he'd dated. Who hasn't? But they never worked out, putting even more emphasis on the whole 'you'll never have true love until you find your Mate' thing he was always told by his parents. Girlfriends came and went. Sometimes mutually. Sometimes not. But no matter what happened, no matter who he dated, no matter who he'd spend the nights with, it never felt REAL.

Because it was still black and white.

Dan came out of his thought bubble to find that Brian's hand was on his shoulder, and the hand holding the petal was clenched into a fist.

"Dan," Brian said. "Come on buddy."

Dan shook his head slightly, easing himself back into the kitchen. He unclenched his fist, and the little crushed petal floated to the floor. He watched it as it fell, the air resistance making it look like it was dancing before it touched the tile.

"I'm sorry." Dan didn't mean to say this. If anything, he had every right to be upset and bitter about his situation. But he didn't ever want to be bitter in front of Brian. He didn't deserve the guilt. All he did was find Rachel, and all he ever did was be happy with her. 

Before Brian said anything more, Dan turned sharply and walked into the bedroom, shutting the door behind him.

It was about ten minutes that Dan had to himself before Brian opened the door to check on him. And in that time, he just let his mind wander to wherever. To random beats of random songs in his head to what the hell did he have for breakfast this morning to what it would be like to stop time whenever he wanted.

He stuck on that one a while. To be able to stop time whenever he felt like it. He could get so much done. Songs, videos, writing, so many things. But that isn't why it stuck in his head. Because if he could stop time, then he could take all the time he needed to find his Mate. He could stop everything and find them. He could drive clear across the country to look without getting behind on anything. What if he could do that? What if he could? It'd be so much easier.

But what if's never helped anyone.

So Dan just laid there, trying to think of nothing at all, with his legs hanging off the bed so much that his feet touched the floor. He splayed his arms out on the bed and just laid there, focusing all his energy on his breathing.

As mentioned, Brian had come in ten minutes later. He wanted to check on Dan right away, but he decided to at least give him a little space. He opened the door just a crack.

"Dan?" Brian asked. Dan didn't look at Brian, or move at all. All he did was make a noise that Brian took as his permission to enter the room.

"Dan, talk to me." Brian came into the room, shutting the door behind him. Even thought there was no one else into the house, it still felt like there was more privacy that way.

Dan still didn't answer Brian, even though he wanted to. He wanted to ask Brian something, and he got so close to a few times before, but he just never mustered the courage to do it. He wanted to so badly. He could hear the question in his head. He could hear himself saying it. He could see the way his lips would move to form the words. He could imagine the question so clearly. 

So why couldn't he ask it?

"Dan?" Brian tried again. To try and get any kind of vocal response from Dan. No avail.

Brian sighed, figured Dan just wanted to be left alone, and turned to leave.

Something pushed the question out of Dan. "Hey Brian?"

Brian turned around, his hand still on the door handle. "Yeah?"

"Could you...Um...Could..." He didn't know why he thought the question would sound so silly NOW. He had asked it before. But today, he just wasn't feeling it. He didn't feel like talking. He felt like listening. "Could you tell me about the colors again?"

Brian smiled, happy to be able to help his friend a little. "Sure," He said. He closed the door, and walked over to the bed. He then took the top half of the bed that Dan wasn't occupying, and they both stared at the ceiling.

"What ones do you want to hear about?" Brian asked.  
There was a pause. "Can you go down the rainbow for me?"

'Sure,' Brian thought. And he began telling Dan about the colors in almost a bullet point fashion.

"Red," Brian started. "Is like anger. Or an explosion. Red is an action color. The color your cheeks turn when you're embarrassed. The color of blood. It can mean danger, but also love. Love is red. Like a beating heart right inside your chest."

He had almost continued with orange, when Dan interrupted him. "Can you do blue?" Dan had taken a liking to the way Brian described the color blue. Like he could almost imagine what it looked like. Like he could reach out and touch something blue, knowing that it was. Even though he couldn't see it, it had become his favorite color.

Brian talked about blue. "Blue is like water. All calm and loose. Like waves in the ocean. My eyes are blue. So is the sky. But only during the day, and when the clouds aren't there, and the sun is shining, the sky is the brightest blue you can imagine. Your costume is blue. Blue is...blue is like you, Dan. It's happy and free and calm and all over the place."

Dan closed his eyes, letting his mind be consumed by the words Brian were saying. He floated in them as he spoke them, like he would float in water. Blue water. Under a blue sky. With a friend that has blue eyes.

"Yellow is like sunshine. The sun is yellow. But people mostly wear it around spring time. It's an awfully noisy color, but it's really bright and pretty to look at. You wear yellow sometimes. It looks good on you."

Dan couldn't help but smile at his words. Brian had a way of doing this. Making him smile even if he didn't think he could. 'i look good in yellow?' He thought. 'hm.'

This went on for god knows how long. Brian made it from R O Y G to B I V and then some. He talked about colors like mint and lavender and magenta and olive. And he didn't mind at all. Why should he keep it to himself anyway? Dan didn't deserve to be out of the know. Even though he still couldn't see colors, he could know which things were which colors. And that's something a lot of people didn't have. Still don't have.

Dan said thank you to Brian, but still asked if he could have the bedroom alone for just a few more minutes. Brian said sure, and walked out, leaving Dan alone with all the things Brian had said.

"Red," Dan said slowly to himself. He said it again. "Red." He enunciated the word as much as he could. And then repeated to himself what he was told. "Is an action color. Like blood or an explosion. But it can also mean love."

Dan wondered if that was the color you first saw when you found your Mate. He wondered if they came in order, the way Brian described them. In reds and then oranges and then yellows and greens. He wondered what the sky looked like on rainy days when the clouds covered it up. He wondered what color grass became when it died. He wondered about colors in his world of black and white.

"Blue," Dan said. He kind of pointed at himself, putting his two fingers over his heart. "Is like me."

'Oh,' He thought. 'If only I could see it.'


End file.
